Every night I nurse two babies to sleep on my lap. Then every night I lift a baby to each shoulder and carry them upstairs to bed. Every night I look as those sweet dreamy faces and wonder how many more nights I'll have the strength to carry them together. I know the time is coming nearer. Tears in my throat, I've whispered this confession to my husband. He offers to carry one upstairs for me. But I am not ready. Not ready to close this chapter. Not ready to give it up. I look down on this precious double blessing and smile. Tonight I will. This night I still can.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
Friday, March 25, 2016
Saturday, March 19, 2016
Holding On to Me
Over the last 13 months I do not remember a single morning or evening when I have not begun my prayer with "Lord, I'm tired....". Well unless you count the times when I've started, "Lord, I am SO tired." Many days this has been the beginning and ending of my prayer, my sole thought as I am crawling into bed. I'd like to say that I have at least done a better job at praying through out my day. But not so. Mostly I've been a popcorn prayer, "Lord, help me not to lose my temper right now." "Lord, please just give me enough strength to get through the next five minutes." "Oh God, please let the babies stay asleep long enough for me to brush my teeth." There have been prayers of thanks too -- for the warm sunny day, for the $1 clothing clearance that started just as I walked into the store, for my husband who does supper dishes almost daily.
Lately, I've been thinking though. The babies are now over a year old. It has been at least that long since I've had a regular time where I could spend even just 15 minutes alone with my Bible and my God. Good Christian mamas are supposed to have a daily quiet time and so I've been trying to find a creative way to put this back into my life. Today I got to chat about it with a dear, dear friend whom I haven't visited with in well over a decade. I love this friend for so many reasons, but especially because she is just so practical and real.
These are some of the bits that I gleaned from our chat.
When running a marathon, the runner doesn't stop in the midst to sit down and eat a meal. She grabs protein bars and shakes, snacks along the way. And she's thankful for the times before the race began when she sat and ate healthy food in order to help sustain her body through this time.
God has a lot of confidence in His grace.
And finally, How great is God's love and grace that He holds onto me even when I cannot possibly hold on to Him.
So I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing. I'll start each morning telling God that I'm tired, and end each day the same with some chatter and praise and a plea for wisdom and mercy, until one morning I wake up feeling a little less tired. I'll just keep trusting and praising because He's holding on to me even when I haven't the strength to lift my arms to Him.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
Lately, I've been thinking though. The babies are now over a year old. It has been at least that long since I've had a regular time where I could spend even just 15 minutes alone with my Bible and my God. Good Christian mamas are supposed to have a daily quiet time and so I've been trying to find a creative way to put this back into my life. Today I got to chat about it with a dear, dear friend whom I haven't visited with in well over a decade. I love this friend for so many reasons, but especially because she is just so practical and real.
These are some of the bits that I gleaned from our chat.
When running a marathon, the runner doesn't stop in the midst to sit down and eat a meal. She grabs protein bars and shakes, snacks along the way. And she's thankful for the times before the race began when she sat and ate healthy food in order to help sustain her body through this time.
God has a lot of confidence in His grace.
And finally, How great is God's love and grace that He holds onto me even when I cannot possibly hold on to Him.
So I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing. I'll start each morning telling God that I'm tired, and end each day the same with some chatter and praise and a plea for wisdom and mercy, until one morning I wake up feeling a little less tired. I'll just keep trusting and praising because He's holding on to me even when I haven't the strength to lift my arms to Him.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
Wednesday, March 16, 2016
Breaking for Spring
This week we are taking a break from school. All of a sudden we went from plodding with slow but steady tread to ... well... I was still plodding, but not so steady and I was dragging everyone else behind me. Feeling quite confused by it all, I called up a dear friend of mine and poured my messy heart out. Would you believe that woman recommended we take a break?! A break?? I've been doing everything I can think of to pull us all through and her advise was to come to an almost complete standstill, to rest.
I decided that we would take the next 10 days off and begin again on Tuesday. Well, someone (ahem) forgot to consider that our break would end two days after Day Light Savings began. Oy. We are now 4 days in and absolutely no closer to recognizing the change. So here we are taking a few more days of slow and easy before returning to our regular school schedule.
We didn't go on vacation. Things are still happening here. We all are continuing are morning routine. Some chores have been taught and traded up. We're reading together for just 15 minutes at the time when we would usually begin school. We are working on some projects together and also playing together. What has helped me the most is that I've taken some time to de-clutter and re-organize some areas that were badly needing it. And I've taken some time to really think.
Some how I've been forgetting to educate my children as persons. These sweet darlings had become something else that I needed to check off my list. And I was getting frustrated that filling their hearts and minds wasn't quite as simple as filling my washing machine. And so we back up. I back off. We find joy.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
I decided that we would take the next 10 days off and begin again on Tuesday. Well, someone (ahem) forgot to consider that our break would end two days after Day Light Savings began. Oy. We are now 4 days in and absolutely no closer to recognizing the change. So here we are taking a few more days of slow and easy before returning to our regular school schedule.
We didn't go on vacation. Things are still happening here. We all are continuing are morning routine. Some chores have been taught and traded up. We're reading together for just 15 minutes at the time when we would usually begin school. We are working on some projects together and also playing together. What has helped me the most is that I've taken some time to de-clutter and re-organize some areas that were badly needing it. And I've taken some time to really think.
Some how I've been forgetting to educate my children as persons. These sweet darlings had become something else that I needed to check off my list. And I was getting frustrated that filling their hearts and minds wasn't quite as simple as filling my washing machine. And so we back up. I back off. We find joy.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
Thursday, January 7, 2016
My oldest boy is 8. My only girl is almost 6. Eeek! Then my little middle man will be 4 in just a few weeks. The twins will be a year old in February. It's been a crazy year. Somehow we have done schooling off and on. There are weeks of moving forward with our curriculum and weeks of moving forward with life. And sometimes there are tears where I feel like we're all just falling backward. But those are the times where I have lost perspective.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
Tuesday, December 15, 2015
Saturday, December 12, 2015
Tuesday, September 29, 2015
Song For a Fifth Child
Song For a Fifth Child
by Ruth Hamilton. 1958
Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth
empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
hang out the washing and butter the bread,
sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
by Ruth Hamilton. 1958
Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth
empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
hang out the washing and butter the bread,
sew on a button and make up a bed.
Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
Oh, I’ve grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
and out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
but I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren’t her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
for children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
and out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
but I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren’t her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
for children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
Peacefully BuZzInG!
Misty
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